Our 21st Today! | 21 Things We've Learnt

As I'm writing this post, I'm sitting here with the biggest chunk of cake - not just any cake, an incredibly, stunning hand made unicorn cake! With a cup of tea of course because it's our 21st! Yep, we are officially big girls. So I thought I'd write one of those reflecting-back-on-life posts because let's face it, that's what we all do on birthdays. Another year older and hopefully a lot wiser.

1. Not Everyone is Horrible - I've met shitty people, we've both dated shitty people but guess what? Not everyone is the same. Not everyone is this world is malicious but unfortunately, some are. Trust people when they've earned it. Keep faith that some people are kind.

2. Take Up New Opportunities! - Speaks for it's self! get all the experience you can get!

3. Don't Like Something? Give It Up! - Including jobs, people or something else. Don't be miserable. There is always something out there.

4. Live Life To The Fullest - This is in connection to number 3, do things that make you happy!

5. Love Yourself - Because you deserve it!

6. Put Yourself First - This is important. Take care of others but don't forget about yourself either. 

7. Never Give Up Hope - I've felt lost so many times but the best thing you can do is get back on your feet and be positive. Harder said than done.

8. Be Yourself -  We fully embrace our alternative style and we've never felt better within ourselves or style! 

9. Art & Music is Our Passion - No matter what, we always draw & make music and it makes us feel at peace. Art is such a creative thing and never fails to cheer us up or inspire us. 

10. Health is so important! Having the flu taught me this, especially in this last year.

11. Having a Blog Makes Us Happy - We love our little space in the internet - the ultimate escape from the real world!

12. High End Make Up Is Worth It! Urban Decay makes me the happiest girl ever and also makes me feel like the ultimate badass makeup queen. Definitely worth spending my money on! 

13. Metal Music is Superior. 

14. Red Wine is Surprisingly Amazing! - Having never tried it before, I found out a week ago that I love the red stuff! 

15. My Family is Everything - I don't know what I'd do without them!

16. Heartbreak Gets Easier - I thought my heart would be broken forever but with time, it's healed. 

17. Bad Relationships Aren't Worth It - Cut those toxic negative people out of your life. All they do is hurt you over and over again.

18. Travelling Is The Best Thing You Can Do - Spending our money on experiences is so important to us.

19. Bubble Baths Are The Best - There is nothing better than getting a bath and putting on cosy pyjamas afterwards!

20. Time goes so fast - Make the most of it! 

21. I couldn't do this life without my twin sister - I love you so much Rach! 

There you have it! What have you learnt this past year?

Leah. x

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Feeling Low & Going Through A Hard Time...

All images included in this post our not ours and are found on Pintrest via Google.

Hey everyone, this is a very different post to what you usually find on our blog Cyber Mermaids but I wanted to be honest with all of our lovely readers and tell them whats going on in my life. Plus I always think a good rant and talk is good for the soul, heart and mind.

So as you can probably tell from the title of this post, I'm going through a really shitty time right now. Things have been shit for the past few months, especially since January of this year. Me and my boyfriend haven't been getting along for a long time which is so sad to write as at the beginning of our relationship, we used to be best friends... soul mates in fact and everything was so so so good. He was my first ever boyfriend which is so unusual for a 19 year old but I was waiting for the right one :) and I thought I'd finally found him :) so the first few months of our time together was so sweet and lovely. We made each other so happy and we both helped with each others confidence. I thought we would spend our lives together because that's how right we were for one another. It's crazy how one person can make you feel so happy and loved. I treated him as my number one and vise versa.

Cracks started showing when I had a feeling his mum didn't like me, she even called me 'that Rachel' like I was a dog or a piece of dirt, the worst thing is my boyfriend didn't even think that was horrible which is fucking weird I think. I just got on with things and did my best to try and get along with her. We'd been going out for a few months now and I'd still hadn't met his friends. I was worried as I thought I meant we weren't in a 'serious' relationship. I brought it up and we both fought but decided I'd meet his friends soon. Another one of my worries was that whenever we went to his house, we would never ever go out. Most couples go on dates, we didn't.

Weeks go by and I still haven't met his friends or been on a proper date or even go out shopping in his home town. I felt like he was ashamed of me, I felt like his secret girlfriend. These feelings were made 100% worse because we had a long distance relationship. Ever week he would come visit me after a three hour train journey and spend a few nights at mine and then I go back to his with him.
I got pissed of at staying in the house 24/7 when we were at his, so I eventually stopped going. That was another massive crack in our relationship.

Weeks and weeks went by and I could literally feel the distance growing between us. Sure, he would come and visit me but things just felt different. He put his friends before me and wouldn't text me for hours and it was pretty clear that I wasn't his first priority. We started arguing more and wouldn't cuddle as much :( Our 'first' breakup was in January of this year but my heart was breaking so much. After a two weeks of barely talking and a lot of tears we decided to get back together. I was so happy but also a little nervous. I thought we could work through our issues and be happy again. We've had a few happy times this year but the arguments got more frequent and I just felt like I couldn't bring up my worries and insecurities. I just felt like our relationship was in pieces. We were arguing every week plus we barely saw each other anymore, he would visit me every few weeks and I didn't want to go to his house anymore as I hated being stuck in and feeling like his secret.

Now, I sit here feeling really sad and alone. I don't know how to feel, think or what to do. I think we're finally over. We had a yet another argument the other day and I'm literally feel numb. We haven't talked for a few days now and I feel so broken :( In my head I know our relationship is over but my heart is crying and is so confused. I know we're not meant to be a couple anymore but I still love him, I wish we could still be together and make things work but I know it's just wishful thinking. I loved him so much and i still do. I can't just switch off my deep feelings for him, I thought we would be together forever but obviously not. Right now, I feel like a shell of myself. I haven't even cried as I literally can't, I am   n u m b. The thoughts of him moving on and him not being in my life anymore rips me apart... I can't even think of it.

Sure we had bad times but we had some really great times too and that's what I will remember and be thankful for. I will never regret this chapter of my life. It was a lesson and I've learnt a lot. I feel so sad, all I can think about is our good happy times and I wish it could've stayed like that. Why couldn't our relationship work? It makes me so sad wondering why everything went so wrong.

Well, I guess I should finish this post now. I feel so alone but I know I'm not. If any of you guys are going through this then I hope I've helped. Thanks for reading and please leave a comment as they really do make me smile.

I hope you're all having a lovely weekend,

Love Rachel x x x 

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Merry Christmas and our blogging return!

Hey everyone, Merry Christmas! It seems so unreal that another year has nearly passed but right now lets just enjoy Christmas before talking about New Year! I hope you're all having a wonderful Christmas. Leah and me have decided to make a return to the blogging world! Our most successful blog was called Beyond the Velvet but we gave up on that blog last year. I'm not too sure why we gave up blogging but I've really missed our little space on the internet these past few months! Our last post was on April this year when our blog was called Leah Rachel Goth. You might've noticed that our new blog name is Cyber Mermaids! A new start calls for a new blog name right?! Cyber Mermaid seems like a perfect name for our little blog as me and Leah have a big love for alternative fashion and makeup that makes a statement! We also love mystical things like Unicorns and Mermaids! Who doesn't love Unicorns though? Make sure to follow this blog on Bloglovin'! I hope you're all having a very very Merry Christmas! See you all on the next post!

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